Chapter Nine - A Daydream in the Nightmare

     A World without Misery (Interitus 1: Book 0)

Chapter Nine – A Daydream in the Nightmare

 

“Hatasuko, you’ve changed the world! Nothing will ever be the same,” said a familiar voice from the edge of the tempest.

The storm of screaming souls had changed since the night that he defeated the Interfectus. Though his body had transformed and received a power of unparalleled strength, Hatasuko was still cursed by the tempest in the depths of his mind. Their screams had never faded away, but they were different than before. The lost souls remained in an insentient state where they could not perceive the world itself, but they still felt the world through his emotions. His sense of hope grew stronger every day since he defeated the Interfectus, so the lost souls felt his hope and grew calmer as a result.

“Both the outside world and the tempest within me have found what it means to feel hope. Even I am optimistic for the first time I can remember. We’ve all known despair for so long, but now there is a light at the end of the tunnel,” he replied to the voice.

“You are the light at the end of the tunnel,” Adishina said with an upbeat tone.

“I don’t want to take credit for something I haven’t actually done yet, but… I know I gave a lot of people hope. I believe that hope itself is dangerous, since people can start to expect something that was maybe never possible. But at the same time… I know that this is possible because it is my destiny. Besides, Lazaro said that word of my fight spread across Agrideī. People want to join us; people want to help us! There’s a handful in each city. He’s more excited than I thought was possible! And Vaida’s happier than I’ve ever seen her. She won’t stop wearing that damn eyepatch, but at least she’s found hope. Maybe I can give her happiness. I want more than anything to give her happiness.”

From the depths of his mind, Adishina whispered, “You give me hope, too. You’ve always given me hope. When my parents left me to die, I thought it was normal. I let myself believe that it’s just human nature to leave each other behind. Every man for himself, kill or be killed, survival of the fittest, right? It made sense to me. But when I met you, I realized I was wrong. You are the fighting spirit of humankind, Hatasuko. You care about everyone in the world around you—even the souls that were already lost to the darkness. You’ve said that Vaida hates herself more than anything else, so you made it your duty to give her happiness. I felt like the whole world had left me behind, but you proved me wrong. You didn’t just give me hope because you stopped an Interfectus; you gave me hope in humanity itself.”

Though his body still slept as the sail-rana rolled through the southeast desert, Hatasuko stirred in his sleep. Through her tired eye, Vaida saw this movement from the other sail-rana. Hatasuko sat alone in his vehicle since he was now much larger than his friends; Lazaro had to sit behind Vaida as a result.

“Adishina, that really means a lot to me. All I’ve ever wanted to do is take the misery of this world and paint over it with hope. I know your misery isn’t gone; you’re still scarred by the actions of your worthless parents. But even that will end in time.”

“Thank you. I originally reformed myself and brought my soul to the edge so I could warn you of an attack, but I guess my emotions got the best of me. I’m sorry I got off-topic,” she said.

“A warning? What kind of warning? What do you mean?” Hatasuko asked.

“The Interfecti communicate with each other just like people. I am inside them just as much as I’m in your head, but I cannot understand their language. All I know is that they talk, and they’ve demonstrated their intelligence. The other Interfecti know about you by now, and I can feel a counterattack. I can feel that they’re going to attack the forest city of Pomasylva, and it won’t be long until then. I hate to be the messenger of something so bad. I just want to help you on your journey,” Adishina explained as Hatasuko started to fade from the tempest’s edge.

Before he disappeared completely and awoke in his living body, Hatasuko told her, “You’ve already done more than you could know.”

            When Hatasuko awoke in his giant body, he saw the sparkle of starlight reflecting on the river. The river flowed on the northern horizon, but due to the dimmer starlight in this place, he guessed that he could reach it in minutes.

He yelled out, “Hey Lazaro, Vaida! I don’t think we can stop at Lumipyla or anywhere else. I just got word from the tempest; an Interfectus is gonna strike Pomasylva. We’ll have to ride the river all the way east to the ocean again!”

“That’s fine. While you were recovering and wasting all our time, I made sure to get the word out. Lots of people want to join us, boy. We should meet them before we get in the water,” Lazaro shouted over the gusting wind.

“Will the recruits really be ready to join us?” Vaida quietly asked.

“I don’t really care one way or the other. Those who wanna fight the Interfecti will come with us. Those who aren’t ready will go home. Whether they stay or go, they can make a larger rescue team. From now on, Hatasuko and I will fight each Interfectus since we’re both strong enough to hurt them. Vaida, I want you and the other volunteers to work on evacuation. As much as it kills me to admit this, you’re actually half-decent at saving people’s lives,” Lazaro said, loudly enough that both Hatasuko and Vaida heard his voice over the wind.

Hatasuko glanced up and saw several red glares near the edge of the river. Many silhouettes of people stood beside this candlelight. On some level, Hatasuko was excited to see so many supporters; it validated a campaign that felt hopeless for so long. But at the same time, his natural shyness discouraged him from wanting to approach them. The silhouettes of the people looked deformed, though Hatasuko quickly learned that they all had large bags on their backs. They must have traveled a long distance to get here. There were many small boats and even some sail-ranae parked near the edge of the riverbank.

             “It’s him! It’s the giant who stopped the Interfectus!” yelled an excited woman’s voice in the crowd.

Many people stood up all at once. The strong wind extinguished several candles now that people did not guard the flames with their backs. Hatasuko could see excitement glisten in the eyes of the people who stood by the river’s edge. He realized as he saw them that this was a small representation of a larger trend. Everyone had been waiting for a savior. Everyone was waiting for the day when someone would rescue them from the Interfecti, and now they thought they had found their salvation.

Hatasuko grabbed the mast at the front of his sail-rana, folded in the sail, and then set it down so that he could roll to a stop. Nineteen sets of eyes watched him without looking away. He quickly found himself intimidated merely by their stares, but Hatasuko knew that they had good intentions. He knew that they finally felt a spark of hope, and it struck the gas in their souls to create a righteous inferno.

After stepping out of his boat, Hatasuko nervously announced to the crowd, “Please, I’m no giant. I don’t know exactly what it means to be what I’ve become, but I am called an Astrodeus. I don’t know if this is another way of saying that I’m just another type of monster, but I’ll defend people even if I’m not technically a human myself.”

All nineteen people looked back at him with bright eyes and wide smiles. The group appeared to be a perfect cross-section of the people in Agrideī. Some were short, some were tall. Some were young, some were old. Some were frail, some were muscular. Everyone seemed enthralled to see their hero for the first time, but Hatasuko still struggled to see himself that way. He heard the patter of Vaida and Lazaro disembarking from their sail-rana in the background, but the crowd surrounded him before he could see them.

“What was it like to stop an Interfectus?” asked one person.

“Did you really break its whole arm off?! That’s so crazy!” said another.

“Can I get you anything? You must be tired! You must be thirsty.”

Hatasuko stammered as he stepped backward, “Please, everyone, can I have a little space? I’ve been fighting Interfecti for years. I’m not really used to meeting so many people!”

“Aww, he’s like a gentle giant. Strong but silent. I like that,” said a woman near the front of the crowd.

“Yeah, no one told us you’re so handsome. Someone must want you all to herself, but now her little secret’s out,” said another girl with a big smile.

            The women caught up to Hatasuko before he could back out of the crowd. Both women looked very similar; he quickly realized that they were sisters. They both placed a hand on his strong stomach and squeezed gently upon his muscles. He wanted to mumble something to dissuade them, but his brain was completely befuddled. He certainly did not expect this level of attention, but it felt as exhilarating as it was terrifying. Both sisters looked up at him and smiled. Their blue eyes shimmered from the pulse of starlight. They were both attractive, but his attention disappeared almost as soon it arose.

“HEY! Everyone, listen up! Hatasuko may be our best fighter, even I can’t deny that, but he’s still an idiot so you’ll all be working under me! My name is Lazaro, and I want you all to fall in right now,” Lazaro yelled from the other end of the crowd.

The sisters glanced at each other and sighed. They rejoined the rest of the group and gave Lazaro their attention, but Hatasuko stumbled away from the crowd. He glanced over and saw that Vaida stood at a distance from the new volunteers. Based on where she was standing, he knew that she had seen the two sisters corner him in the crowd.

“Good morning, Vaida. This is… gonna be a lot to get used to,” Hatasuko said.

“It’s all for the best. Hey, do you want an albapomus? I, um, I saved you one,” she offered with a shy smile and a fruit in her hand.

“You saved one? But you’re obsessed with those,” Hatasuko said with a playful grin as he graciously accepted.

“I’m happy to save it! I’m so proud of you, Hatasuko. You changed the world with a slash of your sword! You’re amazing,” she raved with a nervous voice as she looked down.

Hatasuko sank his teeth into the fuzzy flesh of his white fruit. The juice splashed around his teeth and dripped down his chin onto the desert floor. When he pulled the albapomus away from his mouth, he saw that he had already half-eaten it. His mouth was much larger than it used to be. He then looked over at Vaida, but she did not return his stare.

“Vaida, are you alright? What’s wrong?” Hatasuko asked.

             “It’s just… well, I, um, really enjoyed the time we spent together. Now that I know how Harvey feels, how he really felt all along, I know that you’re my only friend. I just wish it could stay this way. I know this is a lot to ask, and I have no right to even say this in the first place, but please don’t forget me,” she whispered.

Hatasuko glanced down at the top of Vaida’s head. Since he had grown much taller by becoming an Astrodeus, she reached a height close to his ribs. Because her head faced the desert floor, the strong winds blew through her dark hair and pulled it behind her. Her long hair flapped in the wind and shimmered beneath the starlight. The light side of her face looked luminous from the glow, though her eyepatch concealed her facial scars. She wore a long-sleeved shirt, and therefore she had hidden all her scars except for those on her neck and right hand. Hatasuko sighed and placed his right hand on top of her head. Vaida flinched as soon as he touched her, but then she glanced up with her good eye. She smiled as she gazed at him.

“Vaida, I won’t even give myself the chance to forget about you. Look, as long as you’re still fighting, you’re stuck with me! We might be in different places on the battlefield itself, but you’re still my first companion. You’re my practice partner and my best friend! And even on the battlefield, even when you’re evacuating and I’m fighting, I’m still with you. Even when we’re not in the same place,” Hatasuko assured her.

As he spoke, Hatasuko ran his fingers through her hair again. Vaida’s left cheek became slightly red as his large fingertips ran along her scalp. He could see the fading anxiety in her eye.

“Thank you, Hatasuko. I was so happy for you! But I was afraid I would lose my only friend. I should have known you wouldn’t let that happen,” she said.

Hatasuko bent down lower and wrapped his arms around her. Both worlds fell silent as they embraced. The crowd stopped speaking, and the tempest stopped roaring. He held her tightly, and the wind pulled his golden hair so that its leftmost portion flapped against her face. When Hatasuko finally let go and stretched himself to stand tall, he saw Lazaro walking toward him with a young man at his side. Hatasuko could see that this man had a bow and a quiver of arrows wrapped around his back.

“I haven’t surveyed all the men yet, but Arken here has a very special ability. It seems he can hit any target at any distance, even in the strongest winds. I have decided that he will join the attack party when we next fight the Interfectus. You and I should be able to distract the demon long enough for Arken to hit its eye, and then you’ll have the perfect chance to take it down. What do you think?” Lazaro asked with an enthusiasm that defied his general apathy.

“That sounds incredible! I’ve always wondered what would happen if we could actually hit that golden eye. I can’t wait to work with you,” Hatasuko spoke as he extended his hand.

Arken smiled and quickly accepted his handshake with a firm grip. He excitedly answered, “Likewise! I’ve always wanted to bring the monster to its knees; I can’t believe I’ve finally got the chance! This isn’t my first time meeting Lazaro, so I always assumed he would be the first guy to take one down. I’m glad I can finally help defend people!”

“That’s true. The first time I found the kid, he was a whiny little whelp. A real crybaby. When I left Lumipyla, he even tried to follow me! I thought I was about to have a stalker on my hands, but the kid was too slow. I’m sorry, boy, but Vaida makes a much better stray than you,” Lazaro teased with a sarcastic groan.

Hatasuko quickly scanned the area and verified that Vaida had not heard him. Instead, she spoke with a woman near a small sail-rana at the river’s edge.

“I was terrified! I was a little kid, and Lumipyla hadn’t been attacked before! I didn’t even know what was going on. It was just fire and screaming,” Arken recalled with a grimace.

Lazaro chuckled and said, “I’m just giving you a hard time, kid. It’s a miracle that either of us even escaped that place to begin with. That was one of the first times I ever actually found an Interfectus, so I wasn’t ready. I definitely wasn’t ready to watch my hometown burn. It doesn’t matter. Arken, I want you to talk to your friends and secure your place on a sail-rana. You’re in the attack force so you’re more vital than the rest of them.”

Arken nodded and dashed off toward the water. Hatasuko and Lazaro both watched him run to the river, but then Lazaro grumbled and walked away. Hatasuko wondered if Lazaro was upset by the memory of the Interfectus attacking his city, but this did not make sense. Lazaro had said before that people only embarked on this quest if they had already lost everything. His conversation with Arken implied that he had already begun chasing Interfecti by that time, suggesting he had already lost everything. But since was the first time his hometown had been attacked, it implied that he had lost everything before he saw an Interfectus.

“Lazaro, I know you don’t want to hear me ask this, but the curiosity’s killing me. I guess I’ve wondered about it ever since we first met. What happened to you? What set you on this path? Why do you chase the Interfecti?” Hatasuko asked as he ran after his mentor.

After a brief pause to think, Lazaro walked toward the river and explained, “The same reason as everyone else. I’ve got nothing left to lose. I reached that dark abyss, the same one that you and Vaida know very well, where you come to understand that your own life is inconsequential. It’s that hopeless corridor where you come to accept that you’re never gonna be happy again. But instead of taking my own life, I decided to do the one and only thing that could bring meaning to my pain. Since I’m as good as dead either way, I might as well spend my life saving someone else’s.”

Hatasuko walked behind his mentor so that Lazaro could maintain his quiet voice. The splash of the river and the howl of the wind drowned out his voice. No one else in the crowd could hear him.

“But I already know that; I think I understand better than anyone else, since I am cursed to hear the screams forever. I’ve heard the same agony expressed by a thousand voices in a thousand different ways. I just don’t understand what it was that you once had. I want to know what was so important to you that it turned you into this.”

“The one thing that I could do nothing without. Mind yourself, boy. You really want to know what it was that made me empty?” Lazaro asked.

“I want to know what was so important that it turned you into a bitter asshole, into someone obsessed with making everyone else just as miserable as you,” Hatasuko retorted.

Lazaro turned away from the water and glanced for a moment at Vaida. She stood by the sail-rana with a small group of people listening to her speak. Lazaro then glared directly into Hatasuko’s golden eyes. Even though he was now shorter than Hatasuko, something about him still felt towering and intimidating. There was a powerful presence beneath his green eyes.

“It was my children. I lost my daughter and my son in the same night, and I guess that was all it took to make me fall. I couldn’t bear the thought that I would never hear their voices again. I couldn’t stand to think that I would never see his eyes spark with curiosity. I would never see her smile at the sky again. The way their playful shouts echoed through the house… it just made the world so empty without them. Everything was empty. I would never feel their warmth again, and time just doesn’t flow backward. Not ever. Nothing could change what happened. And it wasn’t that they were taken away by the overlord of anguish; it was a human who killed them. Just a single man with a tainted heart,” Lazaro explained as a latent anger blazed behind his eyes.

            “Lazaro, when you say he had a tainted heart, do you mean-”

“Yes. He was touched by the darkness, boy. I lost my son and my beautiful little girl because a man couldn’t handle his curse. Because a person succumbed to the darkness and became a monster hidden in human form.”

Lazaro and Hatasuko both fell quiet. Lazaro glared off toward the west with furious eyes. His mouth was open, and his teeth grinded against each other. He held his trembling fist in front of his chest, but then he turned his head and stared again at Hatasuko.

In a low voice, Lazaro explained, “I knew from the moment we met that you’re cursed. I knew you were touched by the darkness before you even understood what that meant. It took all my strength not to kill you as soon as I saw you. I guess that was for the best, but even now, I can’t look at your eyes without feeling pure hatred. I knew you were an asset; I knew I could use your curse to help this world, but I also can’t deny my hate. I’ve hated you from the very start. I hate you and your kind more than the world that did this to me. I hate you more than I hate God for standing idly by as our cities burn to ashes. I hate you more than I hate the Interfecti themselves. My soul’s always been a raging battle between anguish and animosity, but lucky for you, I’m practical enough to know that you’re necessary. I knew from the start that you’re too useful to die because of my bitterness. I never expected that you would actually become a goddamn monster, but I’ve given up on trying to find out why this world is as it is.”

Taking his mentor’s hatred in stride, Hatasuko said, “I know you don’t want to hear this. But I think that on some level, I was always meant to be cursed in this way. I don’t know if destiny is something we’re born with or something that appears along the way, but it’s the same result. Either I was always meant to become the first Astrodeus, which means I was always meant to be touched by the darkness, or this destiny became mine in the moment I was cursed. It doesn’t matter. I can’t take away your hatred, I can’t take away Vaida’s misery, and I can’t rewrite the tragedies which have already hurt this world. All I can do is make sure that nothing bad ever happens again.”

            With a heartless chuckle, Lazaro shook his head and answered, “I know exactly how you feel, boy. But there’s a twisted beauty to your vision—one that undermines the fact that it’s impossible. If you are somehow successful, if you really do create a world without misery, then everyone out here will cease to exist. There will be no more Lazaros, there will be no more Hatasukos, there will be no more Vaidas. The type of people who chase the Interfecti will disappear. But I guess that’s all for the best.”

“I suppose. But that’s too much to think about. Let’s just drop it and get going. I’m happy to have the help of all these people, but I’m too exhausted to greet them,” said Hatasuko as he glanced at the crowd.

“Yeah, go ahead. Just make sure you bring Vaida in your boat. I don’t want to deal with her right now.”

Hatasuko nodded and stepped away from the luminous river. When he turned around and faced the crowd of quiet silhouettes, he saw that the desert sand reflected the starlight. Everyone started to turn when they saw him walking back over to them, but he chose to ignore their discomforting stares. He knew that these stares were not meant to be malicious, but it still unnerved him to have so many people watching him at once. The two sisters from earlier gave a smile and wave when he glanced toward them, so he quickly looked away. Hatasuko walked to the other end of the crowd and approached the sail-rana where Vaida conversed with two other women.

With a happy glint in her blue left eye, Vaida explained, “I have a theory! Well, I’ve actually found a linear relationship between the size of the sail and the strength of the wind force. But it doesn’t matter too much, well… since you’ll never really be able to go faster than the wind, even if the sail area is giant. The important thing is that the wind force has to be stronger than the friction holding you back! I made my sail pretty big since my teammates are heavy, so that means we have a lot of friction. But yours don’t need to be so big!”

“Oh! I have another question. While we were boating here from the west, I had trouble steering in the river. The steering wheel didn’t work at all! I had to rely completely on the oars; I barely made it to shore! Is there any way to steer in the water?” asked one of the women.

“There is, yes! When I first made the sail-ranae, I included some gears where you could basically switch from land to water. Whoever made your sail-rana probably included it! Here, I’ll show you,” Vaida answered as she walked over to the front of the boat.

Hatasuko watched his friend with a smile because she seemed more comfortable than ever before. He knew that she was in her comfort zone whenever she dealt with anything mechanical. It seemed that this comfort overcame her natural timidity, even in the presence of strangers.

Vaida leaned over the edge of the sail-rana and landed on her hands on the inside floor. She crawled forward and opened a small hatch on the wooden floor while her legs dangled outside the boat. The two women looked on from each side as Vaida reached into the hatch and disconnected one gear from another. With a quiet sigh, she grabbed another gear which had rested off to the side. She pulled it closer and hooked it so that it connected to the main gear. She then pulled her hand out, closed the door to the hatch, pushed off the floor, and landed on her feet outside the sail-rana.

“The land gear is on the right, and the water gear’s on the left! Whenever you want to switch, just open the hatch, pull off one gear, and hook up the other. You’ll want the gear teeth to mesh, but that’s about all there is to it,” she explained to her small audience.

“You’re a genius! Thank you so much for this. How did you come up with that? How does it even work?” asked one of the women.

“You really think so? Oh… thank you. Um, it works pretty easily. The, um, the steering wheel normally steers the tires on the ground. But when you switch gears, it instead steers the rudder at the back. I found that that the wheel needed too much strength to move the wheels and the rudder at the same time, so I, uh, I tried to lighten the load.”

Hatasuko could sense that Vaida was getting flustered, given her distaste for hearing compliments of any kind. Nevertheless, he looked on with a smile since he knew she was happy despite her nervousness.

“Your invention is gonna change this world! Soon, everyone will want a sail-rana. People will finally get to travel quickly! You’ve done an amazing thing,” said one woman as the other nodded.

Vaida’s left cheek started to glow red, so she pulled up her hand and used it to hide the color. She laughed shyly and then jogged over to Hatasuko as he watched from a short distance. As soon as she reached him, he stammered, “I wasn’t staring at you!”

Vaida’s blue eye opened wide when she heard him say this, and she cocked her head to the side.

“Okay… I kinda was, sorry. But you looked like you were having so much fun! I like seeing you smile. You really love your invention,” Hatasuko said, though he hid his golden eyes as he spoke.

“I spent so much time coming up with it, but I’m proud of my little boat! I guess it feels like my mark on the world. I think it can do a lot of good for a lot of people, but it’s been a slow start. I guess, um, I couldn’t get anyone to take my designs seriously. Lazaro said that people are too distracted by my scars to recognize a good idea, so he took it,” she explained with a slight sadness in her voice.

“Then they must be the biggest idiots in the world. Think about it! They let something as little as appearance get in the way of the greatest invention! And honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if Lazaro’s guess is wrong. Those guys weren’t distracted by your scars. If anything, they were distracted by your beauty. You’re gorgeous, Vaida, and the whole world can see it,” Hatasuko said in a quiet voice so that the crowd could not hear him.

Vaida jumped up and wrapped her arms around him. Since he was now so tall, she had to completely lift her feet off the ground just to hold her face against his chest. Even in spite of this, Vaida still smiled brightly. The patch which covered her scars also concealed part of her smile, but the rest of her teeth shimmered in the starlight.

“I don’t think you’re right, but I’m so happy that that’s what you see,” she said.

“Does that mean you finally believe me?”

Vaida let go of him and finally let her feet fall back to the ground. With a faint redness on her face, she looked up at him and answered, “I believe that you’re not lying on purpose.”

“I guess that’s a start. But anyway, I already talked to Lazaro, so I think it’s time for us to get going. There’s some nice people here, but I don’t really want to meet everybody.”

“Me neither!”

“Right. So let’s get going. I think you’re light enough that we can share a sail-rana, if that’s alright with you. I don’t want you to deal with Lazaro any more than you have to. Plus, I’m selfish and I want to touch your hair,” Hatasuko said with a chuckle.

“Oh, but Hatasuko, you have to sit in the front! You’re only in the back on land. If you sit in the back of the boat, we might tip over,” Vaida replied with a playful smile.

Hatasuko scratched his head and stared off into space for a moment.

“I’ve got long arms; I’ll make it work! Come on, let’s go. We’ve got an Interfectus to kill!”

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