Chapter Nineteen: The Second Astrodeus (I1B0C19)

            Chapter Nineteen: The Second Astrodeus

 

            Thousands of voices screamed from all directions. Incoherent cries choked the hollows of the abyss. The endless misery eclipsed the few pleading voices which had strung themselves together. As Hatasuko stood with his feet in the pebbly sand of the Fons Vitae, he kept his nose just above the colorful water. He kept his eyes closed tightly as he contemplated the anguish in the tempest. He practically felt the lost souls writhing in his brain, destabilizing it with their misery. He felt a desperate urge to prove himself against another Interfectus, but every time his mind wandered to the future, he replayed the crushing memory of Bones City.

            As the rose-colored water slowly healed his bruises and cuts, Hatasuko recalled his last fight against the Interfectus. He remembered that the monster had launched its scattershot at the factory where Vaida forged a weapon; he remembered his injured body stumbling forward, desperate to save her. He remembered his blood spewing from the gashes in his legs. He remembered feeling more scared than ever. And when he had finally found Vaida in the factory, protected from the flames by a shallow puddle of glass and water, he covered her with his body. That had triggered her to revisit her nightmare.

            “I’m still mad at you,” Vaida whispered from behind.

            Though Hatasuko was awake, he had been trapped in a stupor—locked in his mind, caught between the tempest and his memories. He heard the splash of her body moving through the water behind him. But after he turned to face her, he was surprised to feel her arms wrap around his back. Vaida stopped swimming and embraced him closely in the shallows of the Fons Vitae. Her wet hair stuck to her face as her wrinkly fingers gripped his skin. He felt her heart race in her chest, but she had the opposite effect on him. The screaming tempest became quieter. The agony did not disappear, but it was hesitant to interfere.

            “I guess… I just don’t see it. I don’t think that I’m a miserable person. I try to be strong for you, for all of them,” Hatasuko said in a quiet voice, motioning to the many other people in the Fons Vitae.

            Hatasuko noticed the voices and splashes of other people in the water, but he had not heard them before. He saw many people, but no one looked happy. They were all covered with deep gashes, missing limbs, stained with burn wounds, or touched with other tragic injuries. They were all victims of the onslaught in Bones City. As he panned his golden eyes across the Fons Vitae, he took a moment to appreciate the beautiful waterfall that gently poured from the starlit sky.

            Vaida said, “I want you to stop lying to me. Please. I know it isn’t fair, um, I know it isn’t fair for me to ask anyone else to be open. But I’ve shared, I mean, I’ve told you so much. I just wish you would let me in.”

            Hatasuko turned to face Vaida. He saw the anxiety in her eyes. Since water covered her skin, the left side of her face shimmered from the pulsing stars in the sky. Her dark hair concealed the scars on her face. Her lips quivered as she stared into his eyes.

            “But you’ve been through a lot. You said before that your body is a canvas of tragedy, that you remember your pain every time you see your scars. Compared to you, my problems aren’t even worth worrying about! I just want to focus on curing you from—”

            “There is no cure for me! My trauma will hang with me for as long as I live. It’s my curse! This pain is here to stay, and nothing in the world can take it away. I’m in love with you, I truly am, but you are not a cure. You are not a cure because there is no cure! Nothing can heal these scars; nothing can lift this curse. I’m not telling you this because I want to hurt you. I’m not trying to make you leave me alone! It’s just that, well, this is going to happen again. This is going to happen a lot. Sometimes, I’m going to shut down. Sometimes, I’m going to feel so miserable that I don’t want to move! I’m telling you this because I don’t want you to blame yourself when this happens. I just want you to understand that I’m hurt, that I’ll be hurt forever. But even when it looks like I’m drowning, I won’t let go. I won’t let go because of you,” Vaida explained, hiding her shy eyes.

            When Vaida glanced back up, a small tear hung in the corner of her dead eye. Though her arms were already wrapped around him, Hatasuko embraced her and pressed the side of his face against hers.

            He said, “I’ll try my best not to blame myself. I just wish I could do more for you! Sometimes, sometimes it feels like it’s the only thing I think about. Somehow helping you.”

            “I think that’s the difference between us. I think about my pain constantly. I don’t try to, and I promise that I want to just somehow let it go, but I’m obsessed. I can’t stop thinking about it! Everything reminds me. But you’re the total opposite! The Interfectus afflicted both of us with tragedy, but you don’t ever confront it. You constantly push it away! You never let anyone else in. It’s like you use your ambition as an excuse to hide from yourself. I’m sorry if this sounds weird, and I know I sound crazy, um, I’ve just been thinking about this a lot. I kinda rehearsed all that. Just not this last part,” Vaida admitted, stammering at the end.

            Hatasuko scratched his head for a moment in thought, but then he set his hand onto her back as they held each other in the water.

            Vaida muttered, “I always kinda felt like, well, like you keep me at arm’s length. Not that I blame you. I hide from the world. I’m afraid of everyone. But I don’t want you to hide from me. I don’t want you to hide from yourself, either. I guess the reason I worry, um, or the reason I bring this up….”

            Vaida stopped herself for a moment and took a deep breath. Hatasuko felt her anxiety, so he pulled his face away from hers. She stared down at the rosy water and thought for a moment in silence.

            “When you protected me in the fire, um, when you pulled me out… it was your eyes. I don’t know how to describe it. They were like the eyes of a scared child. A child helplessly clinging onto the only thing he has left. They were, well, they were the eyes of a crying boy, trying to save his mother from the Interfectus. Except this time it wasn’t your mother. I wonder… if you even realize how much it eats at you,” she explained.

            “I guess you’re right. The truth is that I don’t spend much time perusing through old memories. It’s not that they’re useless; I’m sure I could grow a lot if I stopped and tried to learn from it all. It’s not even that my memories are buried by the tempest; I could confront my own misery just as I confront the world’s. But I think it’s because I have no right to feel sorry for myself. There is no excuse for me to wallow in my misery—not when so many have suffered more than me. Not when their voices whisper in my ear,” Hatasuko explained.

            “I don’t want you to think I’m saying this, um, I think I’m trying to say that I’m not telling you this because I want you to hurt. I don’t. I wish you didn’t have any pain. I wish nobody had any pain… but we do. You do. It’s there even if you try to hide from it. But um, I just want to try to help you. Or at least understand you. Or at least support you. When we were, well, when you pulled me from the fire… I said some things. I said some really mean things,” Vaida muttered, still not meeting his gaze.

            As voices and splashes sounded in the background, Hatasuko and Vaida began moving toward shore. He was tall enough to walk, but Vaida had to swim for a while until her feet reached the pebbly sand.

            “You didn’t say anything mean. It was just a shock. But who am I to talk about shock? You panicked because of me. I knew it was a mistake, but I couldn’t bear the thought of it happening again. I couldn’t handle the thought of losing you,” he admitted.

            “You’re doing it again, dummy! You’re allowed to feel hurt. You’re allowed to feel shock! Especially after the words… you know, the words I said.”

            “Was it true?” Hatasuko asked as they stepped out onto the desert sand.

            “I hate to admit it, but yeah… it was. I don’t think we would be as close as we are now if you didn’t carry any weight. If you weren’t afflicted with misery, then I don’t think we would be able to understand each other. I promise I’m not saying that I’m happy for, um, everything you’ve gone through. I guess it’s just the way I try to make something good out of a bad situation. You were hurt, but you found me because of it. And I found you,” Vaida answered, looking over at him with a shy smile.

            Hatasuko smiled back and said, “In a way, I think that’s beautiful. That’s exactly what my mother used to talk about. The world can knock us down, but it cannot hold us down. It’s like the story of your life! A wonderful girl lost everything she had, but went on to become Agrideī’s most brilliant inventor. She fought the monster that creates all misery, just trying to help everyone else. I—”

            But before Hatasuko could continue, Vaida shoved an aterpomus into his open mouth. He gave a plaintive groan as he set his hand on the fruit, but Vaida giggled quietly and then searched the sail-rana for other fruit.

            “Stop, Hatasuko, you’re making me blush! I was trying to stay mad so you would listen, but then you keep saying sweet things and knocking me off-focus,” Vaida pouted, crossing her shimmering arms.

            Hatasuko smiled as she said this. Her cheeks glowed slightly red from her blushing, though she tried to hide her face as she searched for the perfect fruit. The powerful wind made her wet hair flap like a wave of dark string, hiding her scarred arm as she reached around the vehicle. Hatasuko chuckled lightly as he chomped through the aterpomus in his hand.

            “You don’t need to be mad to make me listen. You know that!” he said with an entertained grin.

            “Maybe so, but I have to be careful. You don’t exactly think these things through,” she mumbled, her face hidden by her windblown hair.

            “Ha! What are you talking about? I’m not reckless at all!”

            “Then why were you so ready to throw your fucking life away?”

            The sudden change in tone caught Hatasuko off-guard. He glanced down at her grimacing face since it was no longer hidden by her hair. Her dead eye glared into him while her other eye angrily looked away.

            “Whoa, what are you talking about?”

            Vaida sat down on the edge of the sail-rana and closed her eyes. Her little body shook slightly as she prepared her words. The vehicle jostled from this motion.

            “In the piscileo factory… in the burning building where you found me. You threw yourself on top of me. Were you really going to sacrifice yourself to the flames? Were you really going to throw away the only chance anyone has left?” Vaida asked.

            “I had to. I can’t bear the thought of losing you. I couldn’t—”

            “And what if you did save me? What then? If I had to watch you die like I watched him die, how could I live with that?! How could I live with that?!” she demanded.

            Hatasuko tossed the core of his fruit on the ground and set his big hand on her shoulder. Vaida turned and embraced him. At first, she hugged him tightly with her muscles flexed, but as her emotions transformed from anger to sorrow, her grip slowly loosened. Everything about the embrace seemed to loosen except for her head; she buried her face into his muscular stomach as she spoke. She resumed trembling; her fingertips dug through his clothes and into his skin.

            “When, um, when it first happened, when I first lost them… I watched him die. I watched with eyes burned open. He, um, he just burned up. The flames went through him. While he was on top of me. Covering me. Protecting me. The flames took my father and scarred my skin with memories. Ugly, ugly memories. If I ever had to suffer that again, like I almost did in that factory, well, I just, I know… I couldn’t recover. I would never recover. There would be no more Vaida. If I lost you like I lost him. You wouldn’t be saving me. I would rather be dead.”

            As Vaida pressed her shaking body against his and hid her eyes beneath his shirt, Hatasuko lifted his big hands and held them upon her. He hugged her tightly, hoping he could somehow comfort her.

            “You’re right; I definitely didn’t think it through. In my defense, there was very little time to come up with a better plan, and my brain wasn’t exactly working at full power. I had lost a lot of blood, the adrenaline was choking my brain, and, well, I couldn’t think of anything but saving you,” he quietly explained so no one would overhear.

            “I know. I know you didn’t mean to spark those memories. I know I’m not supposed to react like this, but I think I’ve always been the queen of overreactions. I punch mirrors when they call me ugly. I don’t, um, exactly have a good handle on myself,” she whispered back, beginning to calm down.

            “Me neither. You and I are prone to mistakes, but that’s alright! Every now and then, it’s probably good to get a reminder that we’re still human. Nothing more or less than the rest of them.”

            A distant yell interrupted their conversation. The voice was stifled because the wind blew in the opposite direction, but Vaida and Hatasuko heard their clear distress. The yell came from a distant group of people on the northeast horizon; they would have camouflaged with the dark desert if it weren’t for the torches they carried. A group of five people ran toward the Fons Vitae. Many of them shouted incoherently, and two pushed a large wagon.

            “They’re distraught. They need help!” Vaida realized, and then she took off running toward the torches.

            Hatasuko agreed, grabbed his whip from inside the sail-rana, and dashed after her. They ran together at near-top speed as the distant shouts became slightly more audible. They were clearly yelling for help. When Hatasuko ran past Vaida, he dropped the handle of the whip while holding the loose end. When she grabbed on, the whip became a mediator between their speeds, and so he dragged her forward with his superhuman strength. As they rapidly approached the group of torch-bearing people, he realized that their wagon carried two bloody bodies. He could not judge their condition, but blood shimmered in the glow of the torches. These people were trying to rush their friends to the Fons Vitae.

            “Let me help you! I’m really strong and fast!” Hatasuko yelled out to them as he let go of the whip.

            The torch-wielding people did not graciously accept. When they saw the giant man run toward them, they stopped running and dropped their torches. Three of the people who did not push the wagon, that being two women and one large man, all pulled out bows and hooked an arrow on each bowstring. Hatasuko and Vaida both stopped running. He saw a deep terror burning in their eyes.

            “Whoa, please don’t shoot! I’m here to help. Your friends have to make it to the fountain, right? I can push them a whole lot faster than you,” Hatasuko announced.

            “Don’t try to deceive us, monster! We know exactly what you are,” barked the large man.

            “Haizo, we don’t have another choice! They’re gonna bleed out any second. They won’t survive if we try to run them. We’re slow, we’re tired, we’re injured! Our friends will die if we keep pushing,” yelled a woman as she pushed the wagon.

            “Please trust him! Have you heard the stories of the giant who fights the Interfecti? That’s him! He’s a good man; he won’t hurt you, I promise!” Vaida yelled as she ran up.

            The man named Haizo sighed and grumbled, but he finally relented. He lowered his bow and stepped aside, so Hatasuko ran up and threw his hands on the reins. With a tired grunt, he grabbed the wagon and pulled it forward; the other people tried to help. In less than half a minute, the wagon rolled so quickly that the others could not keep up. Vaida and the injured bowmen were too slow to push the wagon, but they managed to keep pace with him. He occasionally glanced over his shoulder, but the people in this group still glared at him. Their animosity burned into him with every step.

            After about fifteen strenuous minutes of pulling the wagon through the hard desert, Hatasuko glanced up at the glistening waterfall. The beautiful water shone with a rosy color as it shimmered from the light of pulsing stars. He smiled at the fountain and focused upon it, ignoring his own lethargy.

            “Watch out! You’re gonna roll right into the water,” yelled Vaida.

            Hatasuko glanced back down and saw that she was right; the wagon was close to the oasis. He quickly dragged the wagon to a stop, but the bowmen kept running. Before the wagon slowed down, they grabbed the bloody bodies of their friends and pulled them into the water. Before everyone immersed themselves in the water, Hatasuko realized that they were all injured. Blood stained everyone in this group. They were dehydrated from running through the desert; their skin practically clung to their bones.

            Hatasuko and Vaida entered the healing waters to soothe their exhaustion. The band of desert runners continued to stare at him, even as the water soothed their injuries. He noticed this, but he could not tell if they were angry or apprehensive.

            “Should we go? I’m not entirely sure what to make of this,” Hatasuko whispered.

            “Something strange is going on. I can understand why someone might be afraid of you. You are pretty intimidating. But why are they angry? This isn’t adding up,” said Vaida.

            Hatasuko nodded and scratched his head. With a heavy sigh, he looked over the group of people floating in the calm water, trying to find the best one to talk to. Haizo was the only person away from the others. With a quiet sigh, he swam toward the lone man. Haizo watched with narrow eyes, but he said nothing as Hatasuko approached.

            “Can I ask what happened to you and your friends?” Hatasuko asked.

            “I’m surprised you don’t already know. But so far, I don’t have a reason to hate you. I hate to admit it, but you’ve been a huge help. You might have even saved my friends. So I’ll tell you. I come from the city Lumipyla. Do you know where that is?” Haizo asked as the water cleansed his wounds.

            “Yes, I do. It’s hidden in a canyon that shines brightly from the starlight. Fireflies light the streets. It’s the most beautiful place I’ve seen. The most beautiful city in the world,” Hatasuko answered.

            “Fireflies and bright starlight… yes. That is my city. Lumipyla has known peace for a long time because it is hidden from the world, but it is also vulnerable for this same reason. We were attacked; our village burned to the ground, and it wasn’t by an Interfectus,” Haizo explained, staring angrily at the pink water.

Vaida swam up to Hatasuko so that she could listen. She treaded water to keep herself afloat, but her splashes were quiet and timid.

Haizo continued, “I don’t know how to describe the attackers. They were monsters hidden in the forms of men. These two foreigners stumbled into the canyon, so the villagers tried to help them. We’re known for hospitality in Lumipyla; we find many stray travelers who get lost in the desert. But these men were merely disguised as humans. I wasn’t there when it began, but the young men just attacked a crowd. Tore them down with swords, at first. But even their swords were possessed! They were stained with a weird-looking symbol. And when the villagers got cut, their bodies caught on fire. Black fire. Most villagers tried to run, but some stayed and fought. I was there when they revealed their true form. It was the most terrifying thing I’d ever seen.

“It looked like all the energy in the world just poured into the swordsmen. Even the light itself just seemed to surge inside them. Their bodies were brighter than fire when they transformed. It felt like even the air itself got sucked in! Harvested for its pressure and heat. Ice spread across the ground. It was too cold to breathe! When the transformation ended, they both stepped out of the icy light in the form of giants. They looked just like you. Monsters, not men. We ran like hell, but the monsters kept killing. They tore down everyone they could catch! That burst of black fire marked every murder. And when we tried to run, one of the giants got us with some energy weapon. I don’t know how to describe it, but there was a big explosion. We ran away from Lumipyla and rushed here; it’s the only way to save our dying friends. I can only imagine what they’re doing to the canyon as we speak.”

            Hatasuko and Vaida exchanged an uneasy glance. Concern blazed in her blue eye. She looked back at the sail-rana to silently suggest that they should confront this. He nodded, so without a word, they both swam away from Haizo. He stared after them with an uncertain gaze, but his fear stopped him from questioning it.

Even as Hatasuko climbed out of the pinkish water, he felt countless eyes burn into him. Vaida was slower to emerge because her smaller body could not swim as quickly. Their clothes were plastered to their skin. Their hair dripped rose-colored water onto the desert sand as they approached their sail-rana. Without any words, they jumped into the vehicle and prepared to leave. Vaida pulled up the mast, unfolded the sails, and pedaled slightly to help the boat move. Seconds later, the giant sail caught the powerful wind, the wheels accelerated, and the sail-rana started rolling north-northwest.

“This shouldn’t have happened,” Hatasuko said, finally piercing the silence.

“There’s only two ways this could have happened. If they were touched by the darkness, then maybe they learned the secrets from the tempest… but I doubt it. I know this isn’t what you want to hear, um, I don’t know how to say it… but I think someone was watching us. Someone must have seen you fight the Interfecti,” Vaida muttered.

“They must have seen the array of black fire. The tempest replenished me many times. Do you really think an evacuee could have seen it?” he asked.

“I think… it might be much worse than that. Don’t you remember? For the first few fights, we, um, didn’t know that the array worked on living people. We used to think that the black fire just took a soul from the tempest. But in Procella, you learned that the array, that the glowing symbol…” Vaida said, trailing off.

“I learned that the array could burn a person trapped in a body just as easily as it burns a person trapped in my head. We inadvertently proved that anyone in the world can become an Astrodeus by killing with that symbol,” Hatasuko groaned, throwing his big hand on his face.

“I don’t know if it happened in Procella or Collobos, but it doesn’t change anything. Someone saw you, probably someone we were trying to save! How could they do that? How could they use living people as fuel? It’s horrible,” Vaida whispered.

Hatasuko looked over his shoulder, but he could not see the Fons Vitae anymore. The starlight failed to illuminate its distant water. The desert sand reflected the starlight and created a beautiful glow that guided their journey.

Still overwhelmed, Hatasuko said, “I always thought an Astrodeus was meant to protect people. I knew that somehow, someday, other Astrodei would come about, but I never expected this. I never thought they would be villains. Perhaps I overestimated people. Maybe I just gave us too much credit. How was I supposed to know that people would want to become monsters?”

“I really hate to say it, but, um, I think it makes perfect sense. This array of black fire rewards malevolence. You can use it humanely because you harvest lost souls from the tempest, but very, very few people have that. If anyone else wants quintessence, they must kill to get it. They must make someone else pay the ultimate sacrifice! This means that most of the time, only someone truly awful can use the array. Only someone truly awful can get quintessence. Only someone truly awful can become an Astrodeus. And as a reward for their evil, they’re given the gift of superstrength,” said Vaida as she twisted her hair.

Since he sensed her distress, Hatasuko reached over and slid his fingers into her dark hair. His fingertips ran gently along her scalp as he combed his fingers through her hair. He felt her nerves start to settle. After a few more seconds, she turned to look over her right shoulder, but she could not see him through her blind eye. She then turned the other way, revealing a small smile on the unscarred side of her face. He smiled back, but he still saw fear in her blue eye.

            Hatasuko explained, “When Madeline used to speak to me from the tempest, she told me that Astrodeus powers are unique. The strength of judgment is mine and mine alone. It’s nice to know that when we confront these two Astrodei, they won’t have my same power. But it also means we don’t know what to expect. They could have anything. We must proceed with caution.”

“The strength of judgment… is that what you decided to call your power?” Vaida asked, trying again to disguise her nervousness.

“It’s an interim name! I’m horrible at naming things,” he replied with a dry chuckle.

“At least you didn’t call it a blend-shredder,” Vaida teased, giggling.

“I guess it’s just weird that someone saw me swing my sword on a person in the first place. Both times, I thought I was closer to the Interfectus than anyone else. I thought everyone else was gone! I wouldn’t have done it if I thought people were watching. I just can’t figure out why someone would be close enough to see me. Everyone was supposed to evacuate,” Hatasuko wondered.

Vaida nodded and mumbled, “You’re right. I know it’s a little too soon to jump to conclusions, but that makes it sound intentional. Someone must have chosen not to run away from the Interfecti. In other words, someone must have wanted to stay behind and watch you specifically. It wasn’t a coincidence. But I don’t understand why.”

A cold wave of realization ran through his body. Hatasuko pulled his hand out of Vaida’s hair while he fought through a stream of dark thoughts. Vaida glanced over at him to see why he stopped playing with her hair, but an anxious look crossed her face when she saw his troubled gaze.

“The only explanation… is that someone was so desperate to watch us that they didn’t care if they threw their life on the line! But who would be that obsessed with power? They could have easily died! It doesn’t make sense,” said Hatasuko.

“Unless they’ve reached a state of despair where they aren’t afraid of dying. You and I are both familiar with that dark place. It’s easy to risk your life when you think it isn’t worth anything,” Vaida answered with a small sigh.

“I’ll never let you feel that way ever again.”

Vaida gave him a shy smile, but confliction burned in her eyes. She lifted her scarred right hand and stared at it intently. She she stared at her burns. When the sail-rana ran over a small rock that shook the ship, she grabbed the steering wheel and straightened the vehicle. She never glanced back at her scars, but she stared silently at the starlit horizon as they sailed on.